Dog behaviourist: Why it’s time to treat dogs more like children — not just animals
2025-04-26T06:00:51Z
Suzi Walsh says the latest research shows that dogs can and should be treated like the sentient beings they are.
FOR GENERATIONS, WE’VE been told to treat dogs like animals. Keep them outside. Train them with a firm hand. Don’t spoil them. Let them know who’s boss. But times have changed — and so has our understanding of dogs.
As science, society and the canine-human bond continue to evolve, it’s become increasingly clear: dogs are no longer just pets. They’re family. And in many ways, we should begin to treat them the way we would a child — not as a power play, but out of kindness, respect and deep understanding.
The science has moved on
Modern research has shown that dogs are incredibly emotionally intelligent. They can read our facial expressions, understand the tone of our voice and even mirror our moods. They form secure (or insecure) attachments to their humans, much like a child would to a parent. They need guidance, structure, play, stimulation and above all, companionship.
The outdated model of the dog left outside in a kennel, trained through dominance or fear, has been replaced by a more enlightened view. Dogs are now seen for what they truly are: sentient, feeling beings with emotional needs and a rich inner world. And the more we choose to breed and keep dogs as companions, the more we owe them the kind of life that role demands.
Beyond the baby clothes — why slings and buggies can help
Yes, some people might roll their eyes at dogs in slings or buggies. But if we look beyond the surface, the purpose is far more meaningful than fashion. In a society where so many breeders are unqualified and primarily profit-driven, countless dogs are being bred with behavioural and emotional deficits from the start.
Many puppies miss out on vital early socialisation and are placed in homes completely unequipped to manage or understand them. Dogs that miss out on adequate socialisation in the first few months are at higher risk of developing fearfulness or even aggression later in life (McAvoy, 2022).
This is where tools like baby slings and dog buggies become incredibly valuable. For elderly dogs, dogs with arthritis, and especially those who are fearful, under-socialised, or recovering from trauma, these tools allow them to safely engage with the world. They make gentle exposure possible without fear or overwhelm, which can prevent reactivity and aggression later down the line. A dog who sees the world from a safe perch learns to trust it — and their person.
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We don’t hesitate to carry a child when they’re tired, frightened, or overstimulated. Why shouldn’t we offer the same compassion to our dogs?
Build relationships, not hierarchies
The relationship between a human and a dog should be built on trust and kindness — not control or submission. There’s no need to be “the alpha” or to worry about who’s in charge. These ideas belong in the past. Our dogs are not trying to dominate us — they’re trying to understand us, live with us, and feel safe.
A 2008 study found that dogs trained using predominantly positive reinforcement had lower levels of problem behaviours than dogs trained using punishment. Reinforces that aversive training can contribute to behaviour issues, while reward-based training correlates with better obedience and temperament (Blackwell et al, 2008).
Kindness is never wasted. You can never go wrong by being gentle with an animal. Dogs learn best not through fear or force, but through safety, consistency, and love. The more secure they feel in their relationship with you, the more confident and well-adjusted they become.
Life is intense — dogs need more support
We live in a fast-paced, overstimulating and often overwhelming world. And our dogs, whether we realise it or not, are absorbing all of that energy alongside us. We know now that it’s not ethical to leave them alone for 8–10 hours a day, isolated in a back garden while we work. Dogs are highly social animals, and loneliness can be genuinely distressing for them.
That’s why the need for high-quality dog daycares and dog-friendly workplaces is growing. Or, when that’s not an option, more people are choosing to bring their dogs along on outings to cafes and restaurants — just as they would a toddler.
It’s not about pampering. It’s about acknowledging that these animals have been selectively bred over generations to live closely with us. So close, in fact, that they often can’t cope without us. We need to make dogs a part of our daily lives. Since many people struggle with work-life balance, the only way they can enjoy the benefits of having a dog is by combining dog ownership with their social life.
Related Reads Dog behaviourist: ‘Puppy yoga is a bad idea, nothing about it is ever good for the dogs’ Dog behaviourist: How to keep your dog calm and happy through the Christmas chaos Dog owners who cannot control their pet should be treated as ‘social pariahs’, says McConalogue
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The negative emotional effects of long-term loneliness (anxiety, boredom and frustration) can contribute to long-lasting behaviour problems. In fact, changes in routine that suddenly increase a dog’s time isolated (for example, an owner returning to work after months at home) have been linked to a new onset of separation-related problems in dogs that were previously fine when alone (Harvey et al, 2022).
If we’re going to force dogs into the role of full-time companion animals, then it is our responsibility to meet the emotional and social needs that come with that role.
Compassion over convention
We’re not saying dogs are children. But the way we treat them should reflect the same depth of care and intention. Because when you strip away the species barrier, the needs aren’t so different: safety, love, stimulation, security, and trust.
It’s not about babying them. It’s about recognising the emotional complexity of the animals we choose to bring into our homes, and responding with empathy rather than ego.
You cannot ‘spoil’ a dog into developing behavioural problems by being kind, affectionate, or attentive. Behavioural issues arise from unmet emotional needs, fear, physical discomfort, lack of guidance, or inconsistent boundaries — not from love or compassion. Meeting your dog’s needs, offering comfort, and building trust through positive interactions only strengthens their confidence and emotional stability.
Dogs aren’t here to validate our authority. They’re here to share our lives. And the more we treat them like valued members of our families — not just animals — the better their lives (and ours) will be.
Suzi Walsh is an expert dog behaviourist and dog trainer. She has an honours degree in Zoology and a Masters in Applied Animal Welfare and Behaviour from the Royal Dick School of Veterinary. She has worked as a behaviourist on both TV, radio and has also worked training dogs in the film industry.
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